Hello, friends, it's too hot outside. Today I'll share here some funny screenshots from Facebook. Basically, those are some blog post and their comments. Most of them are sarcastic. Some are serious. I was looking for sarcastic post & comment only, but somehow others draw my attention, so I am including those also.
Well for this post, I want to inform all that I have no "she"! Hahaha! yeah, Audi is definitely one of my favorite brands, but if I want to buy an Audi I have to sell my house first! Better to buy some peanuts!
Relationship is a headache for me. I don't like those shitty fights, unlogical fights! Better to stay single and work! I spend my day by sleeping a lot. Apart from it, I work or my blog, I read tutorial articles, I check different forums. I have previously experienced before. She kept calling, and I was busy on writing my blog post or web design or hanging out outside. No, I am not claiming that those are their fault. It was my fault that I could not handle so many situations altogether. So better to work with a single one.
I had an Android Nokia phone. Even still have in my house, and it's working. Its "Nokia X", a Nokia model with Android operating system. I think it's the first Nokia smartphone that uses Android and it's a super flop. The touchscreen is so so so bad, that if you want that phone from me, I will give you definitely, with $5 cash. But I had another Nokia bar phone which is Nokia C5. It was excellent with a 3.2-megapixel camera. I was very satisfied with it. Even I used that in my college days.
This is a serious post, emotional post, soul touching post. I can relate myself with both boys. How? Well, let me explain. I had an extreme fear of going school or college. I love to spend my time in the home. It's not that I did not study. Yes, i studied in my home. Even it's not that I had a fear of some teachers, it's kind of phobia. I love to stay in comfort zone generally. Though I broke my comfort zone and came to marketing and became successful. I had a fear since childhood- oh God, have to go school tomorrow! My sister was my opposite. She started crying if the school was closed. Our school was same. That is the similarity of the first part. And what about the second? Well, our financial condition was not such bad that we had to think about the meal. But if you consider the comment, she wrote "insecurity of being poor". I don't know why it is working on me, even at this time also. If you ask me, "what is your biggest fear?" I will say, fear of poverty. If the day comes when I have no more money, what will I do? If I need treatment and it takes lots of money what will I do? For that reason, I always aware about saving money in my bank account. Money is needed for everyone's life. It gives a great back up to the strength of your mind. "insecurity of being poor" is my biggest fear. I started blogging not from any creative desire, just to stay away from unemployment and if I could make some money from that. You may say that, I'm copying SRK's words, but trust me it's the same thing happens to srk, to me and I think to everybody, who were not born with silver spoon.
I don't know what should I write now about it, but it's damn true.
When I fought with my girlfriend and sent her message, I waited for hours just to see the blue tick in WhatsApp. Honestly speaking, I've wasted a lot of time for this day after day. It makes complicated our life, better to stay away from this. Cause after ten years Facebook/WhatsApp will not give you money unless you are a digital marketer. :P
This is the kind of true, but I'm not in the category of boys. I was excited about my 25th birthday from 6 months ago. Birthday is something this is very very special to me. Obviously special to all but I give it more priority.
I don't know if my crush ever saw mine like that. It would be easier if I knew who has a crush on me (I think nobody :P) and she knew who is my crush. I had a crush for 8 years long until I get committed with her friend! LoL.
Physical torture is happening any to every gender. Men torture women, and vice versa. But the thing is the mental torture is much more dangerous than physical torture. Better to stay away with any commitment and live alone happily.
In younger age, I wanted to be footballer or software engineer. Then I have been suffering from extreme leg pain and had to leave my dream. And when I learned HTML programming first in our school, it seemed very interesting to me, and I started working on web designing with HTML and CSS, not in school, college or any institution, but alone. And I decided that web development suits me better than software development. So I am working on it right now. While checking the posts, I get some hilarious comments there, which you can better say jokes. Here are the jokes I have collected. Check these-
Interviewer: How much milk do these cows give?
Farmer: Which one? The Black one or the brown one?
Interviewer: Brown one.
Farmer: A couple of litres per day.
Interviewer: And the black one?
Farmer: A couple of litres per day.
Interviewer(naturally a bit flummoxed): I see. What do you give them to eat?
Farmer: Which one? Black or brown?
Farmer: It eats grass.
Interviewer: And the other one?
Interviewer(now annoyed): Why do you keep asking which one when the answers are the same?!
Farmer: Because of the black one’s mine.
Interviewer: Oh, and the brown one?
Farmer: It’s also mine!
That moment when your battery is at 3%, and you see your Boss upload pictures of himself and his family. And wanting to impress him, you quickly comment "cool pics" but auto correct changes it to "cool pigs" and your battery runs out! Don't even bother explaining, pal, just find another job.
There was a Bus Conductor, who was Very Rude to his passengers. One day, a Beautiful Young Girl, of around 18 Years, tried to board the bus, but he didn't stop the bus. Unfortunately, the beautiful young girl fell under the bus and died on the spot. Angry passengers took the conductor to the police station, who in turn took him to the court. The Judge was not at all impressed with him and gave him capital punishment. He was taken to the electrocution chamber. There was a single chair in the center of the room. The conductor was strapped to the chair, and high voltage current was given to him. But, to everyone's amazement, he survived. The judge decided to set him free, and he returned to his profession. A couple of months later, an elderly gentleman tried to board the bus. This time the Bus conductor, remembering his earlier experience stopped the bus. Unfortunately, the elderly gentleman slipped and died due to his injuries. The conductor was taken to the police station and then to the court, to the same judge. Though he hadn't done anything wrong, considering his past record the judge decided to set an example and gave him capital punishment. The Bus conductor was again taken to the same electrocution chamber where there was a single chair in the center of the room. He was strapped to the chair, and high voltage current was given to him. This time he died instantly...!!! The question is why didn't he die on the first occasion..?? But, died instantly the second time...?? Okay... here is the Answer... During the first time The Conductor was a Bad Conductor, therefore electricity didn't pass through him. But, during the second time, he was a Good Conductor, so electricity passed through him freely, and he died !!!
First day at the Gym. A lot of sexy ad hot women. I asked the Gym instructor what machine should I used to impress those girls. He said, "try the ATM at the lobby".
A boy and a girl went on a date in a Ferrari
Boy: I want to tell you something Girl: What?
Boy: I hope you will forgive me
Girl: you are scaring me, plz tell me
Boy: I am already married
Girl: Oh! Thank God, I thought Ferrari is not yours.
A teacher asked learners a question in class.
Teacher: What is the difference between a mosquito and a fly?
All learners kept quite except Mike.
Mike: A mosquito can fly but a fly can't mosquito.
A girl went to a doctor;
Girl: Can you call my bf inside?
Doctor: You don't need to be afraid, I am a decent man.
Girl: No, actually your beautiful nurse is standing outside, and my bf is not decent!
SON: Dad how do I know when someone is drunk?
DAD: Come here, you see the four coconut trees there? Good, a drunk man will see eight.
SON: But dad, there's just two coconut trees there.
DAD: [Silent :P]
My Ex posted her picture in a new expensive Range Rover car.If anyone here knows how to Photoshop someone in a private Jet, please let me know.I have to win this battle.
I will try to collect some more hilarious stuff like this and post here with some comments. If you find some like these, you can send me. If you have any query related to this post, feel free to contact me. Just do drop a comment below the box. I would love to reply from you. If you want to see all of my posts, check archives. No more today. Take care. Have a beautiful day.